Blood red moon is really cool, y'all.
Anyway....more Michael Lutin:
- It’s natural post-eclipse to feel disconnected, unplugged and drained of juice after the deed is done. What deed? You acting unconsciously to create distance between you and a certain party.
- Acknowledge your own behavior, claim TEMPORARY LUNACY, and hope the judge* gets the joke.
*“Judge not, lest ye”…you know the rest.
It's spooky how accurate that is for me.
This situation hasn't gone well, and at this point I think it's petered out/he lost interest in talking. He used to be quite chatty in writing and sadly he isn't any more, and I am really disappointed in that. (Regardless of the fact that we'll never get back together, I miss talking to the dude.) And then there was my goddamned chickening out meltdown that I can't explain and when he asked about not seeing me, I hedged about. I'm not sure what he thought about that. I sure as heck don't want to tell him the real truth because I feel awful, but odds are low to nil at this point that I'll even have to worry about it. I think his reason for talking to me at all (he was visiting my town for something and ended up doing it when I couldn't meet him) is gone now, not that he answered when I asked about it, so...I think he's gonna forget about me again for another 5 or 10 years and it's done. Sigh.
I don't want the distance, but isn't it inevitable that was going to happen anyway? If he's just not into communicating any more and trying to get anything out of him turned into trying to pull teeth, and the only reason he remembered to get back to me is now gone... sigh.
I wish I hadn't opened the box. Why revisit all this stuff for nothing, if nothing's gonna happen? And let's face it, if I'm more into it than he is, that'll never go well.
"This eclipse involves Venus and Mercury – the planets of Love and Communication.
So be extra careful with yourself and those you love now. And be very careful when it comes to having any “heart to heart” conversations. You might misunderstand each other, or easily hurt each other’s feelings. (My hubby literally just got upset at me as I’m typing this, because I’m late to go to lunch with him. Ha! ;))
And forgive yourself if any recent “interludes” or “encounters” don’t lead to much… (this isn’t the best time to meet someone new, especially anyone from the last ten days and next couple of weeks… The Moon and Venus are both the astrological indicators of WOMEN – so it’s the women that may feel more disappointed or unfulfilled in any “new” romances now. And we sure don’t need that!)"
"Lunar Eclipses are about relationships and polarities. With the Leo-Aquarius axis involved, this Lunar Eclipse presses us to look more closely at our needs, lacks, and wants in our lives. With the Leo-Aquarius axis involved, this Lunar Eclipse presses us to look more closely at our needs, lacks, and wants in our lives. The Leo-Aquarius polarity deals with the balance between all that is personal (Leo) and all that is impersonal (Aquarius). The energy of Leo is creative self-expression and the boost to the individual ego that we receive through pleasure and romance, while Aquarius rules the group, more impersonal friendships, and objectivity. This Full Moon urges us to strike a balance between romance and friendship, and between expressing ourselves in personal and impersonal ways. The Leo Moon is proud and intensely individual—not content with simply being just one of the team. The Aquarius Sun, while individualistic as well, values independence and the team. The Full Moon illuminates this conflict.
Some sort of crisis (which can be a crisis of consciousness) or sudden awareness of a lack in our lives provides us with a golden opportunity to explore our emotional needs within the context of the house polarity where the eclipse occurs in our natal charts. Relationships may be challenged, broken, or strengthened dramatically at this time. Our discovery is emotionally charged and dramatic. Epiphanies are likely at this time as we become acutely aware of our lack. This understanding can propel us into affirmative action.
Full Moons and Lunar Eclipses bring issues in our lives to fulfillment. Our emotions are heightened, and there is often some sort of drama involved with the house, sign, and any contacted planets activated by the Full Moon. Look to 11-12 degrees of Leo and Aquarius in your own chart (allow up to about a 5-degree orb when examining the planets and points it aspects). This Lunar Eclipse gives us a cosmic push to make needed changes in our lives. The areas of life activated by the eclipse may see dramatic turns, after which the path is clear to move forward. Note that whatever happens at this time is nothing truly new. The issues have been brewing inside of us, and emotions have been building. Something comes to light at the time of the Lunar Eclipse, and if we get in touch with our emotions, we can get a better idea of what needs to change, or what needs to go.
This Lunar Eclipse in Leo is bound to thrust us into a state of heightened awareness of flaws in our romantic relationships, relationships with children, and creative activities. The Leo Moon is bold, creative, expressive, and loving, but can also be melodramatic and egoistic. Decisions made now are emotionally-driven. Some of us will be irritable and won’t know exactly why. Others will be moved towards romantic declarations or revelations. Still others will be walking around in a kind of daze, seeing only what they want to see while their common sense or objectivity is temporarily “eclipsed.”
Update from Michael Lutin again: AFTERMATH OF ECLIPSE AND SEPARATION: RECONCILIATION of sorts
"If you and another party have experienced a split, this is the perfect time to reevaluate the strength or weakness of that bond. Such events can either blow people apart forever or reveal a weak link in the chain of the relationship that needs to be repaired."
We shall see if that happens. But probably not since the bond, what's left of it, is nothing but weakness. I don't want it to be gone forever but it's been so close to that. And as my therapist pointed out....I have to play it "cool and casual" (which I am not, if I was I wouldn't bother at all) and so I can't be the one to reach out (again).
Sigh. Why did I do this again?