Well, the Grand Cross has started to kick in for me. Whee.
The first event was on Mother's Day. As I've probably grumbled about before, my mom's birthday and Mother's Day are either around or on the same day. This year her friend made arrangements for a birthday celebration to go on for her and another friend in the olde hometowne, so I drove down there. My mother saw that my sunroof (which I never use and tend to forget exists) was "sticking up funny" and kept nagging and nagging me to 'fix it." I hadn't the faintest idea how to "fix it," but the car was definitely NOT leaking rain--I can say that because a rainstorm had broken out on me while I was driving home. I kept telling her to leave it alone and it wasn't broken and it wasn't leaking and I refused to try to "fix it."
Eventually she just lost it and climbed on the car herself and broke the rod that was preventing the wind and rain from getting in OFF THE CAR. Because by god, she was gonna fix it despite having no clue as to how to do it! And thus she CAUSED the problem that she was trying to fix. Presumably after that point the sunroof lost a lot of other parts that must have been flying off the car while I had to drive it home. And the ride home was VERY LOUD, VERY WINDY, AND VERY SHRIEKY. I was going out of my damn mind on the freeway.
I spent the week getting various car people to look into the situation. The final verdict is that (a) I can't fix it myself in class, and (b) it will cost a ton of money to totally fix the sunroof and somewhat less money to just seal off the sunroof. I suppose the situation can wait a bit given the weather, and while the mechanics did break more parts off the car door(!) during their attempts to figure out what needed fixing, it at least isn't making horrible whistling noises while driving on the freeway any more. I'd almost think it wasn't broken, though I don't know how it will function in a driving rainstorm yet. So it's not super urgent quite yet....but worrisome.
Mom and I are negotiating who pays for it, i.e. it should be her, which she admits to. On the other hand, given how much it's gonna cost, I don't know if she'll actually go through with it or not.
And then another problem blew up: someone I know is in trouble and I have agreed to publicly support her in her problem. I probably should have thought it out beforehand that the public-ness of it might not be the best idea for me, if you know what I mean. I'm not the only one joining in, which might help the ramifications a bit, and I've got someone high enough up to bat for me for the next few years so that might help too. But...I don't know. Most of me is all, "This isn't right, and I'm gonna say so," but realistically. I probably should have cowered and kept my mouth shut so as to not have the shit hit me too.
Sigh. Well, I did it to myself in the end, I suspect.
I asked my shrink today if April was any crazier than usual. She said, "So far no, March was worse," but then said it's been nuts all year. Yeah, that's not gonna improve from what I hear.
"Often a crisis can be a blessing in disguise, and we should all be glad that Jupiter is involved in the Cardinal Grand Cross. Although in part, Jupiter serves to amplify the potentially scary effects of Mars, Uranus and Pluto, Jupiter also brings hope. Jupiter can give you the philosophical strength and wisdom to make the whole mad explosion of life make sense. Getting out of a tight spot takes hard work… but it also requires the belief that the light at the end of the tunnel ISN’T just an oncoming train."
And then there's Libra Seeking Balance:
"For those expecting the Grand Cross to bring closure or a clear end to some phase in their life or a relationship, I am beginning to see evidence this may not occur right away. In part because a Grand Cross is a stable pattern with the four corners balancing each other, and due to the Sun and Mercury both in Taurus by the time the last aspect rolls into place, giving us seven planets in earth and water. Have you ever been driving along and run into a patch of deep, gooey mud? That’s the effect all those planets in earth and water will have on the momentum built up during Aries Season. Rather than continue to blindly dash forward, we could end up sitting in one place having to deal with all the side issues we had previously ignored."
"Eclipses simply tell you that a crisis has arisen, and something in your life must change. There are no guarantees that the changes will be permanent or positive, just that they must happen. And while the storm swirls around you and alters the landscape of your life, there you stand, motionless in the deceptively still eye of the hurricane. For you, my friend, are the constant. The eclipse is in your chart. All this turmoil has nothing to do with your boss, your mother, or the checker at the supermarket. You are the one who fell asleep at the wheel of your life; but bless you, you are trying to wake up, and you are unconsciously enlisting others to act as your alarm clock. That’s why the people who are messing with your head and freaking you out the most, deserve your tacit thanks."
"So the void in Libra shows “the problem and the solution” in any frictional circumstance. If there’s friction, it’s due to an imbalance that needs correction, or perhaps a new perspective to restore harmony and equilibrium. The more we maintain poise, grace, and diplomacy, blunting or moderating the urge to explode sideways, the better.
Because Mars is now getting closer to the opposition to Uranus, it’s beginning to enter the field where the Great Fracturing will be exact at 14 Aries, Cancer, Libra, and Capricorn. I gave you a few keywords for the area in Libra that being most stimulated at the current time. Study those degrees and use them wisely!"
"In addition, we have a total lunar eclipse on Tuesday, and eclipses often bring sudden developments in our lives. For most of us, these changes likely won’t involve circumstances we don’t know about already. The same is true for the grand cross. Major events in the world and in our personal lives have been developing over time. That’s not to say there won’t be startling news and stunning breakthroughs, but they most likely will relate to circumstances already in play. And don’t discount the potential for sudden, huge leaps forward."
"Eclipses ask you to make friends with the dark – the darkness of the mysterious, unknowable Great Mystery, the darkness of your own deep, yucky feelings now erupting to the surface. This is a time for invoking TRUST and COURAGE. Trusting the cycle of death and rebirth, trusting that there WILL be a rebirth, even if you’re currently stuck in the dark and the dying with no signs of new life. The courage to feel your intense feelings, shed another layer, and let go of what wants to end.
First up is next Tuesday’s Lunar Eclipse in Libra (12:44 am Pacific) – a super-potent Full Moon illuminating the parts of yourself you’ve been denying or hiding. The light of consciousness is swallowed by the dark, and the shadow wants to be revealed. The Libran shadow is co-dependence – where are you being “nice” at the expense of being authentic? Where are you sacrificing your desires and vitality to “keep the peace”? Where are you holding back your creativity and individuality because you’re afraid people won’t like you? Where do you wear a mask of caretaking to hide your true self?"
Oh SHIT. Every time I read things like this, it's like "yup, that's work." And "crap, the eclipses will get me fired." Even though I have been positively angelic there lately--the being "nice" and "caretaking" and all that shit makes people love me in a way that being myself does not. I'm tired of hearing how being myself only makes people miserable.
"The Cardinal Cross is so much about daring to be who we really are at a time when we can’t afford not to, and having to shed shed shed all that programming that tells us it’s not safe, it’s not possible, why bother anyway. All hands on deck, please – this is not the time to play small (if there ever was one), not the time to hide out living someone else’s path or purpose. Wise mythologist Michael Meade reminds us that NOT living your purpose is not a “neutral situation” – the gifts you’re not using turn against you and destroy you from within."
Oddly enough, it keeps FEELING like "do whatever others want" is the right answer, though. Being me hasn't gotten me anywhere, except bitched at and in trouble. I...just don't get it, really.
"On April 14th, we have Mercury in Aries conjunct Uranus; the words/idea/reveal that jolt you into awareness. Also on April 14th, Pluto in Capricorn turns retrograde (at 13 degrees), intensifying its excavation of stale rules/restrictions. This becomes ultra-internalized, obsessive work. Finding a piece of detritus you’ve been clinging to, zeroing in on it, and blasting it away. This is the degree of the Cardinal Cross, pulling its theme of fresh starts into the eclipse mix. You can’t have a start without an ending. Hence, the Full Moon eclipse.
Keep in mind that what this eclipse concludes will be necessary in order to navigate the Cross. “Concludes” can mean anything from transitioning from single to married, married to divorced, employed to jobless, jobless to employed, etc. It’s the closing of one chapter, so another can begin. Since this will be a culmination, it won’t come out of nowhere. Events have been building for awhile."
"Most of what we're missing, I believe, is trust in ourselves. Self-trust is the foundation of all other kinds of trust because all of them come back to you trusting your decision to have faith in a situation. This has been injured so many times that it seems like trust is either impossible, or it is always going to be betrayed. Neither of these is true, but it will seem true if it's the only option we have.
Mars retrograde is pushing these issues to the front. We stand at a point of decision. And in a few weeks, that may seem deeply urgent. If you're looking at the world, at your relationship, or at yourself and wondering what to do, I would ask: What would it take for you to trust? What would you need, or need to do?"
And Oh My Stars: wow, I like this one.
"Part of the problem with predicting the future with astrology is the same as predicting it with any other technique: when does an event actually start and end, and what’s an event anyway? Let’s say that next Tuesday at 11:35 AM your foot gets run over while you’re crossing the street. Although that’s an isolated incident in time and space, when did it really start? Did it start when you crossed the street? Did it start when the driver decided to answer the cell phone rather than concentrate on traffic? Maybe it started last night when you were at the grocery store and forgot to get flour for your recipe, thus necessitating the walk to the store in the first place. Can we trace it back to the day that driver started fighting with her boyfriend, thus causing the cell phone conversation which got your foot mashed? If so, why can’t we trace it back to the day she decided to go out with that jerk in the first place?
With astrology we can see larger patterns forming, and then look at smaller and more specific time periods when the transits of the faster planets will tend to set off specific events. If next April 22 your spouse turns to you and says “I want a divorce,” it’s not likely to be a spur of the moment decision prompted by Mars joining the exact degree of the Cardinal Grand Cross… it’s probably something that has been building for a while, and at least in theory it should be possible to see something like that coming.
Then again, try as we might, sometimes there are just days when life decides to run over your foot."
"Regardless of your actual age, this probably feels like your midlife crisis. In a lot of ways you need to shed your skin like a snake… you’ve outgrown your current trappings, and need to expand. It’s just a shame that sometimes that process can be incredibly painful."
"Think back to how your life was running between May to July 2013. What was going off the rails back then? What areas of your life were most agitated, or most subject to unusual circumstances? Those were the last times Uranus passed through the degrees it is in now and will be in for the Cardinal Grand Cross. Unlike those times though, it is now joined by three other planets in making trouble — or is that “creating opportunities?” — for you."
Right, here's what happened then for me. Or didn't happen, as it were. So...I got completely disillusioned, lost all hope, and everything has emotionally sucked since then. It's only going to get worse from here on in then, eh?
"Now would be an excellent time to run away and join the Rebellion. But do you know why you’re rebelling? Do you know what you’re rebelling against, or what you want to replace it with? Or do you just feeling like throwing some bricks?"
Um, not really, and definitely no clue on a replacement. Which is why I generally don't rebel and throw shit.
"In a month that is already packed with thrills and chills, having two eclipses adds a zesty topping of dread for those of you who like to panic about things. Eclipses have a way of stirring the imagination of both astrologers and non-astrologers alike. If you find your self worried about this month’s eclipses, perhaps it’s time to take a step back and keep some basic principles in mind.
One: It’s never the eclipses that get you anyway.
Eclipses may happen on a specific day and time, but they tend to spread their influence out over time, and don’t usually become a factor until they are triggered off by a transit from another planet. They set up dramatic circumstances, but don’t usually deliver those in and of themselves.
Two: Half of you will be (mostly) off the hook for the April 29 eclipse.
One of the traditional rules for determining the effects of the eclipse on an individual is that it is much more powerful if it happens “above the horizon”: in other words, the April 29 eclipse (which happens at 9° Taurus) will have the most impact on you if your Ascendant is somewhere between 9° Scorpio and early Taurus. The Tuesday eclipse is affecting 25 degrees Aries and Libra… so check all three of those points to see if they land close to anything in your chart.
Three: You may not be in the eclipse path.
Although the April 15 eclipse will be visible throughout most of North and South America, the path of totality for the April 29 solar eclipse passes over part of Antarctica to Eastern Australia, thus sparing most belief that readers of its worst effects."
Yeah, this is my favorite one.
"Today we are going to talk all about the nature of eclipses. each year we typically have four, and this month we have two: a total eclipse of the moon (a full moon) on April 15 in Libra, and a solar eclipse (a new moon) on April 29 in Taurus. Of all the aspects I speak about in my columns, the eclipses are the most important ones to watch. Eclipses are the most dramatic tool the universe uses to create change and to get us moving in a new direction."
I also totally love this graphic.
I'm going to make it into an oracle deck card.
In other news: so far my work hasn't been terribly nutterpants this week, but I'm told tomorrow should be a burning ring of hell. Awesome!
Also, I did a couple of tarot readings on what will happen in April and ah....let's just say the Lovers came up twice and all this romantic stuff indicating finding true love. I know better than to buy it, but that two readings indicated the same thing makes me wonder. Also, there was nary a Tower or a Death or a 10 of Swords to be seen. GO FIGURE.
"This is one of those months where things will just keep on happening ? and happening?. Just when you assume nothing ELSE could possibly happen, something else inevitably will. Is it possible to squeeze so much news and change into one tiny month? Yes, for sure, and April is due to be a turning point month for many, of all signs. We have a very tough new moon on March 30, influencing the first half of April, and then two eclipses, a lunar full moon eclipse in Libra on April 15, also quite full of power and might, and a solar eclipse in Taurus on April 28/29 that will affect you the most, but that is a little bit milder than the April 15 eclipse.
While these eclipses won't be exactly easy, they are necessary, for the main job of an eclipse is to test the strength of situations and relationships and to bring any weak links to your attention. The universe wants you to have a strong, vital, happy, and highly productive life, so anything that the eclipse finds that impedes that mission will be shown to you or else swept away."
So I'll end up unemployed at this rate? Thanks, universe! Oh, wait, no.
"Eclipses are non-negotiable, so if the eclipse fosters an end to a relationship or a condition, the only way for you to approach that news is to move forward. The eclipse will lock the door on the past, and there will be no way back. If you don't like the changes you see shaping up now, you will be able to make new changes later, on the road ahead. For now, you must accept what you see happening. The eclipses will correct any situation you didn't know about, ignored, or that you did not have the courage to take hold of with both hands, quite straightforwardly.
This particular set of eclipses will break patterns of the past and set you in a new direction. These will be powerful, especially for the cardinal signs (Aries, Cancer, Libra, and Capricorn). You are not a cardinal sign but a fixed sign, dear Scorpio, but we all have cardinal signs located somewhere in our charts. The last eclipse of the month, April 28/29, will be in Taurus, the sign found on the same axis as yours, so that one will be the important one to watch.
Lunar full moon eclipses (like the one coming April 15) end a chapter. Solar new moon eclipses (like the one coming April 28/29) open a new path. For that reason, solar eclipses are generally easier to go through, as they tend to present somewhat calmer environment. Full moon lunar eclipses sometimes make us sentimental as they bring up memories and old dreams, and they remind us of the passage of time.
Let's start at the top of the month, and see how the month builds as it moves forward. The first two weeks of April will be highly influenced by the new moon that occurred just two days prior to the start of the month, March 30. It appeared in Aries, 10 degrees, in your house of work assignments, so you may see many changes to assignments, and changes being asked of you may seem a bit random or subjective. No matter, clients won't be able to make up their minds or can think logically, but are feeling pressure from people above to make subjective redo's that seem to have no rhyme or reason. Mars is currently retrograde until May 19, so attempting to get a grip on this will be fruitful - simply smile and go with the flow."
Yup, sounds like my job again. Then again, that's pretty much what it's like all the time no matter what month.
"You may find that a client may announce that he is leaving your company now, or it may be a long-term project that you worked on and enjoyed is now coming to a finish. You may have known this would happen, but even so, you may miss the people with whom you worked and the kind of work you did on it. If you are now suddenly out of work, do not fret, for a new one will come in to fill the vacuum if you begin looking quickly. You of all the signs have the most spectacular outlook for career success of any sign come mid-July."
This makes me laugh and laugh, given how the last time I was supposed to have good luck at job hunting, I did not. I mean, it sounds nice and I could use it, but I've learned not to have hopes.
"Also at work, due to the hard new moon, your co-workers may now change, and a trusted assistant might announce her departure. (She will be doing this at precisely the wrong time, with so much going on at the office, leaving you feeling overwhelmed and helpless for a day or two, until you set about adjusting to this new situation.)"
That already happened, though it's not so much quitting so much as it's a semi-transfer. But yeah, ugh.
"This is simply the way the universe teaches us all to be flexible. I know, you don't need this commotion now, but alas, we are all in the same boat in April. Nothing will happen as you expect it will, as the new moon of March 30 arrived arm-in-arm with Uranus, planet of unanticipated events. That new moon will be a hot potato (there, I have said it), as it will also send a hard glance to Pluto too.
Pluto is your ruler, so you will have to have contingency plans for the office. For example, you may need to hire temporary help to fill in for the merry-go-round of personnel around you. I will advise you NOT to hire new recruits, not with such difficult aspects at play. You can hire temporary help before you set anything in stone."
Heh. Well, that's not under my control or happening until next month (and that will be new recruits!).
"The sixth house, where all your office pandemonium will be taking place, discussed above, also rules the state of your health. It is possible that you may notice that something is amiss, so take care of your health this month, for you need to be your own best friend. The new moon that appeared March 30 was in Aries, ruling the head, so you need to watch your teeth or to be on guard against a headache. If you know certain foods or beverages trigger headaches in you, be diligent about avoiding them now. Of course, keep an eye on your constitution in general, and be sure to get enough sleep in this potentially draining month.
The big event will be the full moon lunar eclipse, April 15, in Libra 25 degrees. You are not the subject of this eclipse, but nevertheless, it will light your house of your subconscious mind. If you have had a problem that has been troubling you, or if you would like to overcome an addicted to any sort of substance, the eclipse will give you the impetus to get help. This may happen because of something little, like a casual comment you hear about you, or another type of event that brings on an epiphany. You can now turn over a new leaf, even if you have tried and failed before, because this month you will have the key ingredient for success - keen motivation and a strong drive to master anything you put your mind to."
????? Okay, so I'm not really addicted to anything, but fixing a problem would be good.
"Mars will oppose Uranus in exact mathematical degree, in the same signs as it did at the end of December, Libra and Aries specifically. (That had to make the year-end holidays in 2013 very hard for certain Scorpios). Here we go again. If you had problems at the end of December, you may not feel them again, as the mathematical degrees have changed, but you must be vigilant anyway. Here is why."
Hm. Well, my year-end holidays were pretty awesome, but it turned out that the aforementioned failed job hunt's seeds of destruction were probably going on then when I wasn't around to hear about it. Good point.
"You are ruled by Mars, and when opposite Uranus, Mars can bring on a confrontation between you and a disrespectful subordinate who has overestimated his value to the firm. It would be hard not to criticize this person, but if you do, your confrontation may escalate to become even more inflamed. Be careful. April 22-23 will be very hot days. The problem is, because Uranus moves so slowly, you will feel this aspect at play nearly all month. Pick your moment to let this person go, but don't give him any reason to go to the human resources department to complain about you."
Hah. I think I'm the disrespectful subordinate in this situation. I need to keep my damn mouth shut, but everyone always complains anyway, right?
"Due to the cardinal cross, legal matters and contracts are being drawn into the mix this month too, and I would strongly suggest you not sign anything now. With too much going on around you, it may be hard to think clearly. Give any papers that will commit you to others the time you need to mull over them."
Well, hopefully that isn't gonna be an issue this month.
"Also, with the Sun conjunct Uranus, you may get some surprising news about your career mid-month, something you never in a million years expected would happen. It could be celebratory, or just the opposite. (These eclipses are tough to predict because Uranus will be prominent all month and will be leaving his fingerprints all over everything). You could score a completely unexpected career victory at this time, one that brings your name to the attention of a VIP at the very top, or you may be trying to fix a near disaster, most likely tied to the subordinate you are dealing with earlier in the month. Let's go with the interpretation of "do a great job, and you'll have a shot at major praise and a promotion by late July." (Or, you may get an invitation to join a competitive firm at that time.) I am not worried about YOUR career outlook, dear Scorpio!"
I am, but it's nice that you're confident.
"This same eclipse, April 15, will shine a light into things going on behind closed doors, in secret, so that you can find out about them and protect yourself. This will be true ONLY if something truly is going on - I am not saying that there is anything for you to find right now. If anyone has a political agenda that has the power to do you any damage, this eclipse will show you the identity of that person in the office now. (The ancient astrologers always referred to the twelfth house as the one that pointed to secret enemies, while the seventh house would always point to open enemies. Both these houses will be lit for you this month, so you do have to be careful.)"
"Scorpio is a shrewd sign, so you, more than most, will step back and observe, a talent that will help you this month. To be clear, I am not saying you have ANY enemies, the secret kind or otherwise, but I am simply saying that part of the possible manifestation of the eclipses point a POSSIBILITY in this direction. I hope this will NOT apply to you. I simply tell you so that you can keep your eyes open, but I do not want you to feel a need to be paranoid. Eclipses expose untoward actions and bring secrets that would hurt you up to the surface and out in the open. If the eclipse finds nothing to expose, you will go through this period easily, and news may be mild compared to what one or two of your Scorpio friends experience now."
That's definitely already going on. At this point I'm reasonably assuming that literally everyone around me is a secret enemy, actually.
"As you get to the end of the month, you will reach the key eclipse for you, a solar new moon eclipse in Taurus, 10 degrees on April 28/29 (depending on your time zone). This will instantly open an important new chapter in your closest romantic relationship. If you have been dating seriously, this eclipse may bring an important turning point - a suggestion to be exclusive to each other, a confession of love, or even a marriage proposal."
"If you are already married, you may now make plans together to work toward new goals. If you have no romantic partner, then this new moon eclipse may be directed toward your plans to form a new business partnership; or for you to find and collaborate with a new manager, agent, publicist, lawyer, or accountant; or if you are the agent, for example, a new important talent to represent."
That would be nice.
everybody is unde a helluva lot.
They say it takes
to create a diamond
But you could also end up in a heap
like compacted trash.
No matter how hard you try,
youu cannot be everywhere
be everything and
please everyone at once,
the whole world
Whatever you do
do it right,
and to hell
with the goons behind you