So this Full Moon in Saggo Eclipse is like a circuit-breaker, rut-buster deluxe bit of astro-weirding. Yes radical candor but high chance it is mostly to your self.
And it’s square Neptune so there is also a strong sense of delusions cracking, omg psychological insights unavailable to you during normal transmission and a haute degree of awareness around any addictions.
Neptune, like Twelfth House planets, is accompanied by that vague and fuzzy, dazed and confused feeling. If we want to nail down anything, a relationship or health problem, we won’t be able to. We can’t see very far into the future. Nay, we may only barely be able to see the next few feet in front of us.
Sagittarius is the sign of overarching perspective, of the big picture, and Gemini is the sign of information, data, questions and more questions. We may want more information, to have our questions answered, and maybe we even think if we had all the right answers and puzzle pieces in place, the answers would save us. But Neptune, square this “searching for answers” axis, doesn’t work that way. At this full moon, there is no one right answer, because what’s required in order for our confusing situation to shift is not a solution or answer per se, but an expansion of consciousness. This doesn’t arrive via email, Amazon.com or another person; you can’t clear things up with a big relationship talk, at least not right now. Instead, it’s a sloooow inward process of surrendering and opening. We may want to make a move but feel immobilized, paralyzed, uncertain about the future. At this moment, that’s exactly as it should be. Sometimes the only answer we can trust for sure is, “I don’t know where to go, what to do.”
Oh god, this is so how my life is going right now. It's freaking terrible. Or at least, I am so incredibly sick of being a slow, late, non-bloomer that I could vomit. I'm angry that my prediction didn't fly, and I got told recently that I cannot find true love until I am 40 years old--I specifically have to be older and wiser, with an older man (I have had heinous experiences dating older men and I DON'T WANNA).
I don't want to believe it, but let's face it: that's how my life is going, that's how my astrology goes, and even though I doubt most of what this psychic told me, that's probably the one super true thing in there for sure.
I am definitely not going to know what the hell I'm doing by the end of May. I don't know anything other than here I am, stuck beyond stuck, slow beyond slow. I want out of this, I want out of being me, and I don't know how to do that and don't think I ever will know.
As such it may relate to an old question that’s coming up again. To me that question is: what do you believe in? The answer to this question has more influence than you might think. In many ways our beliefs are the filter through which we perceive very nearly everything.
The problem with beliefs is that they are often driven by security needs rather than by what we perceive as real, or as necessary. If you eat meat, you have to believe that eating meat is OK. If your husband is a staunch conservative, you may need to believe in conservative values in order to meet an emotional or environmental need.
My take on this eclipse is that it (that is, the circumstances it describes) may prompt you to question something you thought was true, or that you thought mattered to you. You may find yourself unable to believe in what you know is not true for you. If you follow that in (as they say in some kinds of therapy) you may find yourself with an actual question on your hands — a question of faith.
Taurus (April 19-May 20)
Seen one way, the focus of your life is on communicating your feelings, and slipping into a way of being where that comes more easily than you might expect. By ‘feelings’ I mean your point of view, your desires and the sensation of what it’s like to be alive. By ‘communicate’ I mean with others, though more significantly, with yourself. While I would not want to deny anyone consciousness, it often seems like we live in a world where many people have no idea what they feel, and I would say that most humans would be a lot better off if they did. You may, at first, experience the transits this month as magnification or exaggeration. If so, that’s an invitation to pay closer attention to the nuances and the cycles that seem to run your emotional experience. You still seem to have a disagreement with yourself over something, a potential grudge, judgment or inner dilemma where there may indeed be two sides of the story. If so, I suggest you get those two sides into a discussion, perhaps even a negotiation. Do your best to understand both points of view. Neither is strictly true; neither is incorrect; the two added together don’t tally up to the truth. Yet a new depth of understanding can emerge from an extended inner dialog, particularly if it’s gentle and emotionally grounded. This is as much about what is true as it is how you feel about it. Listen to your mind and your body.