I will admit to being stumped by this.
This quote is pretty much me:
"Do you know that anger is frequently the root cause of depression that is not chemical? A person is pissed off, but their anger is turned in. This is not pretty but it is common. “I hate myself!” many depressed people say."
Well, yes. I am angry at myself for going nowhere slowly. I just...don't know where to go with it.
I don't feel like I have much in the way of Mars. I don't mean astrologically--supposedly mine should be a monstrous macho thing, what with it being in the Gauquelin sector and all. I should be a total jock, but frankly, I did not get born with a body that is suited to having major physical prowess. I've spent most of my life doing different forms of dance, but nobody would consider me professionally good (or even close) at any of them due to my lack of leg flexibility. I used to be a bowler, but trust me, I never got to a 300 score and these days I'm better at it on a Wii than anything else IRL. And that's about it.
I dunno.... I don't really have anything to be all "male and thrusting" (oh brother) about in life! I don't mean to "disown," but I don't feel like I HAVE it to own. There's nothing macho and male about me that's coming out to dominate all and sundry. I liked doing self-defense classes back in the day, but those aren't offered any more here. I've pondered doing martial arts as a subsitute, but eventually realized that self-defense kicking and punching was a lot more fun to me than the regimented, uniforms, belt system-type stuff of martial arts sounds. Once in a while I do kickboxing as a substitute for all of that, but I haven't done much of that these days (not thrilled with the current sorta-kickboxing class at the gym now). I don't have that much in the way of macho activities and interests besides that to BE Mars-y about.
*shrug* I get where she's going with that, I just don't have anything to aim at.