Saturn Return Can Bite Me

And more Michael Lutin

Wonder why...

you can be so fired up one day about a person, place or thing
and feel so blah and uncertaiin and anxious and worried the next?
Not even one DAY to the next.
One minute to hte next.

You can be all inspired and jazzed and enthusiastic and optimistic
about a project or a relationship.
And then you think it's all a bunch of baloney.
It erodes your self-confidence as well.
You can be all hopped up and energetic, in a hurry to put it out there, but then..but then..
you just don't give a flying crap about it.
Well, you do, but the obstacles are too great.
The effort is impossible to maintain. One second you want it NOW the next second you think its not worth the wait then you tell yourself be calm be cool everything takes time
then agian you say its not worth it and back and forth ten times.
It's cosmic.
That is exactly the vibration going on: a contest between microwaving a slice of pizza
and slow roasting a potato.
This conflict that will NOT go away immediately.
Uranus in Aries is hot because Aries is hot.
It needs immediate attention.
It craves action NOW, not tomorrow or even five mintues from now.
It wants what it wants when it wants it. It's tired of waiting around for results.
God helps those who help themselves type thing.
It's NOW goddammit, Now!
it's Lady Ga-ga at her most outrageous.
Its Russell Crowe throwing a phone at a wall.
It's a molotov cockatil party.
it's everything you do when you are y fed up with being manipulate and pushed around.

PLUTO IN CAPRICORN, however, is cold because Capricorn is cold.
It waits
It watches.
It reacts slowly and deliberately.
It doens't fly off the handle or come in its pants.
It is the calculation of the possibility of results before moving forward.
It understands the consequences of every act and therefore it protects its king with its pawns..
Not the swiftest player on the team but the one with the endurance.
It grows slowly like a Sequoia tree,
like moss,
like mold in your bathroom, and just as hard to cut down and get rid of.
It can always be counted on for its wisdom,
because it has the benefit of allowing experience to teach it before jumpiing into anything.
Or anyone.
The two forces are operating in the heavens. In world politics. And in your head.
That's why you're hot one day and cold the next.
It's cosmic menopause.

Why I can't change

"Why is it so difficult for some people to change? They remain stuck in the same negative relationships/habits/jobs for decades. It’s clear as day to others that they need to evolve. But they don’t.

I did a very quick survey of the natal charts I have on file. Specifically, I looked for commonalities in the charts of people I’ve known for years who have remained stuck. What I found was that all these people have planets in their 12th House."

And suddenly that explains everything...

"The 12th (naturally ruled by Pisces) is the most difficult part of the chart to access. It represents the subconscious, the hidden, the secret. Having planets in this house is similar to glimpsing something out of the corner of your eye. When you turn to look at it, it vanishes. So any behavior symbolized by these planets will be just as difficult to pin down."

And of course, this is my chart ruler in there.

"Basically, the 12th House is a blind spot. How do you deal with it? If 12th House planets are making aspects to any other part of the chart, this is the access route. For example, Sun in the 12th trine Moon in the 4th can find clarity through emotional (Moon) connections to the past (4th House). Talk to your Mom. Revisit childhood friends/events. Will it be painful? Guaranteed. Awareness of the 12th means sacrificing something, even if it’s your illusions. Also, look at the ruler of the 12th. Aries on the cusp of the 12th House would make Mars the ruler. What’s happening with this planet in the chart? Action, independence and instinct (Mars ruled areas) would be the keys to unlocking the mystery."

Hm....so, my big one for that would be Mercury in the 6th (opposite Pluto), or maybe Uranus (1st) or Neptune (2nd). Chart ruler is Venus in 7th.... So thinking about the day-to-day practical shit in life would cover the Mercury bit. And yeah, that's what I'm running into now. Realizing that I have to postpone the move because at the very least, my driving alone is probably not up to handling 4 hours a day on the freeway or whatever at this point.

As for the 7th house, yeah, partnering helps the situation, when I can find one.

I do worry about what will happen to me if I don't move on my own, though :( I've got one planet in the zap zone (Jupiter) and two planets (Mars and moon) in the "positive Uranus zap zone."

More on the Uranus eclipse

Continued from here.

My second day of driving was...also disaster-prone. I had scheduled a doctor's appointment in Sacramento in an area I vaguely thought I could find, PLUS I had Mapquest instructions there (note: but not back!) printed out, PLUS I have GPS on my phone. I can make this, right?

Nope. My GPS stopped working pretty much from the second I turned it on, forcing me to depend on the Mapquest instructions. Which...yeah, didn't help when it came to my final turnoff off the freeway. Because exit 9 existed, but not the 9A I was expecting to come off after that...and it never showed up. I missed the appointment (and I canceled it altogether because clearly I am not up to rescheduling), cried in the car, and had to call my friend for directions home. And THEN the GPS worked.

I am not normally an OMG MERCURY RETROGRADE person because it usually doesn't affect me, but...

Though really, a friend of mine turns out to have had the worst eclipse day of all: on the day of, her husband picked a verbal fight with some frat boy types, and the frat boys literally picked the husband and my friend up and threw them around. Cops and ambulances had to be called, bruises and stitches in the head happened. Good LORD.

Uranian posting

Use your Uranus.

(1) Figure out your natal Uranus-Aqua – how Uranian you are and how you can max that out so as to thrive in the Zap Zone.

(2) Then look to your Zero Aries point as that’s where things are likely to flashpoint in the next six weeks. Change; could be challenging, could be amazing. Either way, it’s a shakeout of stagnant energy.

(3) How well do you incorporate Uranian energy into your life? Look to harmonious aspects made by your natal Uranus for cues as to how to do this the (relatively) easy way.  

Hm. Still in my fifth house...well, let's hope for some good art projects or something.

Uranus in Aries.

As Uranus sweeps through the Aries part of your life it spotlights who you really are. The types of relationships/lovers you’re actually attracted to. The kind of career you really want. The sort of lifestyle that would honestly make you happy. Thing is, Uranus works through radical change so it’s a guarantee that some people in your circle will be offended/shocked/disapproving of the new you. And while this is distressing, it can’t be helped. When Uranus blows through it pushes you forward. Those that can’t (or won’t) keep up will get left behind.

Easier said than done when those left behind are family members or partners. And please note that I am not advising you to dump your friends/family and start from scratch (the shadow side of Uranus involves cutting everyone off). No. The best way to handle a Uranus transit is to give others the chance to accept your changes. Be open about your plan to embrace reality (because there’s nothing more real than your true purpose). Then do it and let others catch up. Freedom, remember? You must give everyone the freedom to accept you (or not).

Well, I have been trying to do that...slowly telling people here and there about my future plans. People are taking it bizarrely well so far, but then again, I'm not exactly putting pedal to the metal yet. I expect more drastic freakouts--from me first, of course--to come.

I keep wanting to back out on this stuff, when I think about how broke I'm going to be, how possibly homeless, how I may have to work as a barista, IF I GET LUCKY and I can't stand the smell of coffee, how I may never have health insurance again...

Except for the part where Uranus is gonna run through my sixth house no matter what, if I quit or I don't. And it might be better to just get out on my own and all that. I say that since my "busy season" ended right before Thanksgiving again and now commences the long drag of trying to keep myself looking busy until midsummer, wondering if I'm going to get canned...

Saturn in Libra: the sound of silence

So according to the Internets, the aforementioned John Mayer had surgery on his throat yesterday. Because I wondered about the whole transit thing, I looked up the chart transits. Yesterday, transiting Saturn was conjunct his natal Mercury at 20 degrees Libra, with the sun coming up right after that. Transiting Mercury is also exactly conjunct his natal Uranus in Scorpio at 10 degrees. Since Mercury rules speech and Uranus is the higher octave of Mercury, I get the sense that it's a double whopping silencing there with all of that. And sure enough, the dude has to stay silent for a least a month or more. The lesson continues. 

You'd think that with Taurus ruling the throat and whatnot, that might be more prominent in the chart, but Jupiter in Taurus isn't really setting anything major off here, so...I guess not. I'm not an expert in medical astrology, though this link points out that Libra might have throat issues as well.  I dunno, I feel like Mercury is the significant point here anyway.

On a related note (I think I was thinking of this link last time and then was too lazy to dig it up), this post kind of reminds me of this situation. I think I have to agree with this post that it's hell to be a modern-day Libra. Maybe we need to start a "Save the Libras!" movement or something, hah.

Thinking of the Libras folks in my life right now, my double Libra friend with a birthday the day after his is traveling the world right now, so Saturn's hitting her sun in the first house. I wonder how she's doing. Another friend seems to have done a disappearing act, but since she's pretty intermittent on contact, I guess that's not surprising. And my Libra rising friend is about to have Saturn hitting her ascendant...and she seems to have an impending marital showdown likely to go on this weekend for her Libra kid's birthday. HOO BOY. Looking at her chart, she's also got Pluto conjunct her natal Jupiter/Venus conjunction, transiting Neptune and Chiron conjunct her natal Chiron, and transiting moon and Mars approaching her natal Uranus. I'm going to be rooting for some transformational (if painful) moment that frees her from the situation to happen. Soon. Please.

While I'm at it, here's a few links on Saturn transits for those of you with these issues going on right now:

• Bob Marks
• Cafe Astrology

Today is supposed to be zooey

Mars, Uranus, Pluto should be completely nuts today.

Meanwhile, the craziest my day is likely to get is trying to fix my stained glass tower window picture thingie.

TV Astrology: Switched At Birth

So I'm a big fan of Switched At Birth, which is rather ridiculously good for a family show. People are sympathetic and mostly sensible and you feel for everybody and it's awesome. I highly recommend it (go look on Hulu, the pilot's online).

Anyway, the recent episode "The Persistence of Memory" was just plain excellent. AND it also featured one of the switched-at-birth characters finding her birth certificate. Of course, Daphne's real birth certificate is actually for Bay, so... it's Bay's birth time and information. The show has stated the two girls have the same birthday, so I'm interested in looking at their birthday. Alas, Daphne's actual birth time hasn't been mentioned yet, so I'll have to guess.

For those who haven't seen the show: Bay Kennish is a brunette teenage artist type. She's tempestuous, dabbles in getting into trouble, and seems to move quickly when it comes to men. She's the one that got raised in a wealthy family but originally came from a poorer one. She's the one whose birth time we'll be looking at. Her birthday twin, Daphne, is the strawberry blonde athletic type. She's generally sweet and more of a people pleaser than Bay, a wee bit of a showoff herself at times, and has been deaf since the age of 3. She was the one born to the rich people, but got raised by a poorer mom.

I totally guessed that Bay must be a Leo rising, and by god, she is! The drama is very obvious with her. (Plus she loves Frida Kahlo. Both she and her biological mom Regina are really into bright colors.) I'd guess Daphne is probably born around 6 a.m., making her a TRIPLE Libra. Both of them are at least double Libras (sun and moon), but Daphne is clearly the one more interested in making sure everyone gets along.

Both of them have a lot of planets in Libra, with a Libra Moon/Chiron conjunction. That says "mommy issues and pain" like nothing else, which totally fits with the swappage. They both have Sun conjunct their Libra North Nodes, which I think bodes well for them learning Libra issues of partnership and cooperation. Certainly both of them pick up love interests left and right and are very attractive girls! Passionate too with Venus in Scorpio. They also have a Mars/Pluto conjunction, which I find kind of nervewracking. That does tend to bring on... well, physical accidents, maybe being a bit of an anger/violence magnet. That hasn't played out yet on the show, but it's a TV show and you never know when a show might resort to something crazy. I think it bodes a bit better for Daphne (rather than the uninterested Bay) that she is into sports, so she's got an outlet for physicality. (Bay, on the other hand, does graffiti and fake ID's.) They both have Mars in Sagittarius, which in my experience tends to mean that they're both going to be SUPER interested in travel. They both have Jupiter in Sagittarius, which should be pretty lucky. They also have a Neptune/Uranus conjunction. Saturn is in Pisces.

Looking at the placement of the houses in Bay's chart for certain, most of them are below the horizon. Nothing in the first or second houses, but the Libra stellium is in her third house of communication and siblings. I find this funny considering that she biologically has no siblings, but by adoption she has a brother and Daphne is probably more or less an honorary sibling. The Moon/Pluto conjunction lands in her fourth house-- trouble in the family, indeed. Jupiter is in her fifth house, so she has luck with creativity. The Neptune-Uranus conjunction is in her sixth house, so I'd imagine that could be ... interesting... in her work life. The planet of dreaminess and imagination combined with unusual events should mean she has an interesting art career, even if I doubt she'd get massively famous for it what with most of her planets not as on display as her Leo rising. Saturn is in her eighth house of other people's money. Maybe that's an indicator that the money she grew up with wasn't hers, after all.


I'm going to do an imaginary house placement for Daphne with a Libra rising to see how that plays out. It'd give her the stellium of planets in her twelfth and first house, so she is more publicly prominent than Bay despite Bay's Leo rising. (Indeed, her deafness may make her more noticeable in public.) Venus and the Mars/Pluto conjunction fall into her second house. Maybe the Venus in second means that she'll get money via love-- or that she was the one destined to be a rich girl. Except for the Mars/Pluto kaboom. Jupiter falls into her third house = luck with communication and siblings. Hm. Communication is an issue with her, being deaf and all, but for the most part she seems very skilled at all of the methods she uses to do it. The Neptune-Uranus conjunction would fall in her fourth house, and Saturn would fall into her sixth. I'd imagine Daphne will have a harder time getting a job. As for dreamy + unusual, maybe that describes the home life she grew up in, or the unexpected windfall of turning out to be from rich people?

Anyway, this may all be a lot of bull, but it's kind of fun to think about.

Transit fun

Sun-Pluto transits are hardcore even when easy.

Under Sun-Pluto transits some part of our life changes, and nothing stays the same. Sometimes it happens suddenly, and the proverbial rug is pulled out from beneath our feet and all sense of security is lost. It may be a long drawn out process and our life changes completely by the end of the transit, or it is our identity that alters significantly.With Pluto transits it ends one chapter and begins a new one. I know this is becoming an overused phrase on the blog, but it really is the best way to describe a Pluto transit in our lives.

The most significant events in life appear to happen under transits of Uranus and Pluto to our Ascendant, Sun and Moon, and this is not surprising since these are the three most important parts of the horoscope. Transiting Pluto trine Sun represents an easier transition for the individual towards self-renewal, massive changes in life, and endings. Under the Sun-Pluto trine I have observed people relocating across country, and so the transit is massively indicative of a new way (Pluto) of life (Sun). We are leaving behind an old environment and beginning life in a new one, and setting down new roots. I think that such a dramatic adjustment allows us to also reinvent ourselves, and we start life afresh in all areas of our lives.

I do believe, in some instances, that even an apparently benign Sun trine Pluto transit in the chart can turn our life around completely. Pluto transits change our LIFE dramatically and this particular planet fights against inertia, and so we undergo an intense transformation of our behavior and lifestyle. We often feel a more powerful sense of our own destiny, gain deeper self knowledge, and feel more passionate about living. Snake metaphors are particularly relevant when trying to describe Pluto transits to those new to astrology and unsure of the process. The snake metaphor leads nicely onto my next two examples of self-improvement, self-transformation and radical makeovers.

Hm. Well, I've been having one for awhile now (I think it's moved away from trining my sun at this point) and so far, I feel the urge to change, but no clue as to how to do it yet. Maybe it just didn't work in my case.

Uranus transits and Mercury contacts:

Uranus was first responsible for taking away something–and taking it away suddenly and unexpectedly.  Before he communicates anything to us, anything at all, he is the Great Severer.  Now, mind you, he’s fast–he works before we can see him coming, the quickest hatchet man around–but Uranus’s first order of business is to disconnect us.  What is he disconnecting us from?  Our ordinary, ego-bound patterns and definitions and our habitual ways of understanding our world.   Uranus is impatient.  He’s bringing us the future the way he sees it, how dare we get mired in the past? The Uranian disconnect can be ruthless.  Sometimes it’s so fast it seems bloodless, or it can be as bloody as the French Revolution and then some. [Remember that the guillotine was invented (during the discovery of Uranus) as a humanitarian advancement.]  But when Uranus is active, the first thing he does is pull the plug.  He will shake us off no matter how hard we hold on.

In his severing mode, Uranus can be the most frightening of the Three Bullies, otherwise known as the transpersonal planets.   I associate Uranus with a particular kind of trauma in the chart, one that lingers on with nerve-shattering results.  It results in a kind of personal Post Traumatic Stress Disorder–wherever Uranus lies in the chart, it is responsible for a violent taking-away, a traumatic removal.  And unless you really understand this part of Uranus, the rest of Uranian behaviour doesn’t really make any sense.

This is why I keep wigging out, that's for sure. I keep waiting for that axe to fall on me now. :(

Say Uranus falls on the Ascendant of a chart.  This person would identify with being out of the norm, different, more advanced, unusual.  He or she might identify with and fight for humanitarian causes.  Dig under the surface,  the reasons for this behaviour can be a denial of the individual “I”, which can occur because the person involved is somehow robbed (usually in early life) of the sense of individual identity and belonging.  We have a choice of joining the rebellious ‘group’ and finding an identity within it  or we remain forever scapegoats and outsiders, exiled from our own sense of legitimacy in the world.  The erratic Uranian pattern reinforces the behaviour–if ever do try to fit in, I get cut off.  Or I only fit in with the strange and the unusual, .  The best route for Uranus here is the Path of Mind.  We are initiated into a new awareness because we are forced to confront circumstances which remove us from the ego.  All three of the outer planets teach us lessons about getting our egos out of the way.  With Uranus, it’s our ‘little world, little mind’ tendencies that fly out the window.  We are challenged to stretch our definitions.  As anyone with a Mercury/Uranus connection will tell you, the minute you think you understand something, Uranus will step in and take you further.

I qualify for this one right here. (Mercury quincunx Uranus in 1st)

All three of the outer planets initiate us into their awakening by removing us from the primary quality of the lower octave planet.  With Uranus, we are severed from our connection-making abilities. Mercury is the connecting planet which allows us to make sense of and understand our worldly experiences.  Uranus removes the logical processes of Mercury and replaces it with sudden shifts of awareness.  Mercury is the way we make meaning out of information.  When Uranus pulls the plug on us and then rudely bombards us with universal truths beyond our ordinary understanding, we often feel on shaky ground.  Sometimes, where Uranus is concerned, we might know things, but we don’t know why.  Again, our lack of support for our convictions leaves us high up, but on very unstable scaffolding.

Whether or not Mercury and Uranus have a connection in the chart, it’s Mercury that struggles with the new information.  If your Mercury has an aspect to Uranus, even a difficult one, then you’re in luck, because your Mercury has been put on the fast track to Uranian wisdom.  The quickness of mind associated with Mercury/Uranus is not always pleasant in the easier aspects–I’ve seen troubles with both the conjunction and the sextile, because Mercury can get overloaded with the flow of Uranian energy, and can mentally cut out because of it.  The mental processes of strong Mercury/Uranus can easily affect the body, often with nerve issues and mental exhaustion.   If Mercury isn’t ready to process the wisdom of Uranus, there can be difficult consequences.  Uranus is always urging us to let go, to allow distance, something Mercury is often not prepared to do in its struggle to understand.  When Mercury learns that it is capable of making connections at great distances, greater than it ever assumed, then its impact on our lives grows and we allow ourselves to create new concepts of the greater Mercurial connections.  These concepts then become the building blocks of the elevated Mind.  When Mercury stretches its wings, we are no longer confined to the prison of our day to day reality.  We understand that there are new lands to conquer, off where the gods reside and the mere rules of man no longer apply.  And Mercury can now help us lay down the plans to get there.

The astrology of liking bad boys

"Astrologically, of course, you look to your Mars to explain any ongoing attraction to these creatures. It’ll be a revved up Mars with aspects to Pluto, Jupiter, Uranus."

Hm...

Uranus transit fun

"Isabel Hickey wrote that Uranus was the one planet, the one planetary energy, that we could not control (I am paraphrasing so anyone please feel free to correct me). We cannot use our will, our smarts, our wisdom. Uranus comes, sees, and conquers with his “expect the unexpected” upsets and upheavals. The Tower card from the Tarot deck is the most accurate image that I’ve ever seen of how this feels."

I thought this was an excellent quote.