Journal of a mad tedious teacher.
This is the journal of a special ed teacher in the Bronx. It's painful and hilarious at once.
Especially good entries:
The Purple Stapler. (Great ending!)
"So today marks the day that I finally went loca en
la cabeza in front of my students. I didn’t snap over something worthy,
like drugs or dropouts or a student telling me to fuck off. No. I, Miss
Dennis, snapped over a stapler. A miniature purple stapler. It was
missing, and I was mad.
Mind you, I teach at a school where
several computers are stolen each year. Teachers’ wallets and cell
phones have gone missing. I've been lucky. My stapler cost $4.99. In
an attempt to make myself seem slightly less ridiculous about freaking
out over this, let me explain that at my school, teachers have to buy
their own paper to make photocopies for their students. We also have to
staple all of our student packets individually because the stapler
function on the copier never works. (Administrators pay themselves
overtime, but they won’t buy paper or staples for the copy machine.)
Since I was also provided with no appropriate books for my special
education students, I have to make countless photocopies from books I
purchased myself, and I end up stapling countless packets for my
students each day. My little purple stapler was part of my daily
routine, and it made me happy. Its theft, of all things, pushed me
straight over the edge.
“I’ll tell you what’s wrong! Look around this classroom. Look at all these books and posters and videos and markers. Do you know who bought these? I did! With my own money! That’s right! The Board of Ed gives me nothing! Nothing! That was my purple stapler, and no one has the right to take it! That’s it! I’m taking everything home with me.”
I was sure my students would hate me for this
incident. Instead, something strange happened. They began to see me as
human, and they began to respect their classroom.
“Miss, did you really spend your own money on all that stuff?”
“You must really care about your classroom, Miss Dennis.”
"Yet there was Darryl, standing in ardent defense of my class while using the word-of-the-day in a sentence. It was a truly great moment in teaching. "Your mama's mad tedious." Little did I know, when I decided to become a teacher, that I would one day be honored by such a sentence."
"My teacher helped me! If you stop your screaming she can help you too 'cause you obviously got issues!"
Teaching "I Have A Dream" in Vietnam.
"Could it be that some of us in America Vietnam Vietnam
Five years ago, I had the opportunity to teach I Have a Dream to English students in

Best Internet Variety Show (and Good Luck Getting Anything Done, Ever) in 2005! 


This is more tedious. I was an existentialist, and I had always watched I heart huckabees and never understood the chaos theory. Then I started to think that nothing really mattered at all, so I should probably try to be happy with random observations I make throughout the day. This made me think about totally useless things all the time and I couldn't relate to the outside world anymore. So I freaked out, typed in "freaking out about the chaos theory" and somehow I got to your page, read about your stapler, and decided that you care about this stapler for no apparent reason, other you paid for it and that's how you felt attached to it. Then I realized that I was probably missing some big picture, and that I was overanalyzing again, and I was still freaking out about this chaos theory.
But I felt connected to you for an instant, and I'm a 20 year old who dropped out of college, while you're a teacher who seems to have figured life out a bit even though you're very very tedious.
So... thanks. Because that made me happy.
Posted by: Katie | April 13, 2007 at 04:48 PM