Cecil, Welcome to Night Vale: "The problem wasn’t solved, but most problems don’t get solved. I mean, generally we just do our best to mitigate the problem, and if it can’t be mitigated, then it can be relegated to a background noise by pleasant distractions and a prioritization of interests."
Sarah Silverman: "Nothing’s more attractive than an unending monologue about your shortcomings."
Carolyn Hax: "Sometimes surrendering to the awful is more useful than fighting it."
Graham Joyce: "why can’t our job here on earth be simply to inspire each other?"
Dan Harmon: "I believe in magic. I believe in mythology. I believe in shamanism. I believe that spells can be cast and I believe that random things coalesce and reveal themselves to be part of a plan we don’t control, you know."
Nora Ephron: "Never turn down a front-row seat for human folly."
McAlvie "The ultimate downfall of modern civilization won't be war; it'll be Twitter and Facebook."
Jenny Zhang: "A lot of writers swear by routine, but I swear by chaos. There’s enough fucking routine in my life. Every day I have to brush my teeth. Every day I have to smile at strangers. Every day I have to worry about money. Every day I want something I can’t have. Every day I find some way to go on! I know that writing every day for an hour would help me tremendously with writer’s block, but I also know that I need an element of wildness in my writing. I need to know that writing is something I do because it sets me free. It makes me feel golden with confidence. It gives me the gift of gab. I feel like a god. I feel like an entertainer. So write when you damn well please."
Joe Queenan: "If you have read 6,000 books in your lifetime, or even 600, it's probably because at some level you find "reality" a bit of a disappointment. People in the 19th century fell in love with "Ivanhoe" and "The Count of Monte Cristo" because they loathed the age they were living through. Women in our own era read "Pride and Prejudice" and "Jane Eyre" and even "The Bridges of Madison County"—a dimwit, hayseed reworking of "Madame Bovary"—because they imagine how much happier they would be if their husbands did not spend quite so much time with their drunken, illiterate golf buddies down at Myrtle Beach. A blind bigamist nobleman with a ruined castle and an insane, incinerated first wife beats those losers any day of the week. Blind, two-timing noblemen never wear belted shorts."
LogicalDash: "Nobody of any age should have to fend off sexual partners. That such defense is assumed as a part of the cost of adult courtship is suggestive of some more fundamental problem than age difference and its effect on consensuality."
Keith Richards: "I had to invent the job, you know," he said, earlier. "There wasn't a sign in the shop window, saying, "Wanted: Keith Richards."
Caitlin Moran: "As I started to reassess my writing style, I thought about what I liked doing--what gave me satisfaction--and realized the primary one was just... pointing at things. Pointing out things I liked, and showing them to other people--like a mum shouting, "Look! Moo-cows!" as a train rushes past a farm. I liked pointing at things, and I liked being reasonable and polite about stuff. Or silly. Silly was very, very good. No one ever got hurt by silly.
Best of all was being pointedly silly about serious things: politics, repression, bigotry. Too many commentators are quick to accuse their enemies of being evil. It's far, far more effective to point out that they're acting like idiots, instead. I was up for idiot-revealing.
"I am just going to be polite and silly, and point at cool things," I decided. "When I started writing, I would have killed to have one thing to write about. Now, I have three. Politeness and silliness, and pointing. That's enough."
Carolyn Hax: "Unless 15 years’ worth of mail has misled me, no one has ever found love through complaining about the lack of it, and no lonely person has ever felt better for hearing, “You just haven’t found the right person yet.”
David Simon: "Change is a motherfucker when you run from it."
Joe Queenan: "People who read an enormous number of books are basically dissatisfied with the way things are going on this planet. And I think, in a way, people read for the same reason that kids play video games ... they like that world better. It works better, it's more exciting, and it usually has a more satisfactory ending."
Dan Savage: "There isn't someone for everyone. Some of us do wind up alone, and that just fucking sucks and sometimes that stings, and you don't know if you're one of those people who's going to wind up alone until you die alone....So you kind of have to live in hope and build a life for yourself that's rewarding and fun, has friends and pleasure in it, whether you're alone or not."
the painkiller: "I will not be tagged, pinned, circled, liked, tweeted, retweeted or numbered."
Steve Jobs: "Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.
Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”
Apple: "Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do."
Miss Manners: "Please do not -- repeat, not -- make a hostile approach to knitters. Have you not noticed that they are armed with long, pointy sticks?"
Stephen Tobolowsky: "And of course, nothing is what I figured on in my life. That seems to be a recurring theme."
James Bulls: "When you find yourself walking a true path, you will know it because you will want to walk it no matter the burning Sun, freezing sleet, torrential rain, and treacherous ground. The risks become no less and the journey as always exhausts you, but your desire to brave the challenges never diminishes."
Amy Argetsinger: "Twitter is a disease, plain and simple. It makes people insane. A decade from now I expect the CDC and FDA will be issuing warnings."
Cary Tennis: "You don't have to "move on" either. Not until you're ready. People say, Oh, you should be grateful. They say, Oh, it's time for you to move on. I'm like, What are you, a cop with a nightstick? I'll move on when I'm done playing the blues on my harmonica, thank you very much."
Mark Morford: "It is 2011 and here is what we know: Reality is fluid, fact is malleable, cause and effect completely uncertain. We know what we don't know, but we also know the opposite."
Charlie Jane Anders: "Just remember, if you flinch from your destiny, you'll never achieve your true greatness — you didn't choose to be chosen, but being chosen means you have to choose."
Roger Ebert: "To put it bluntly, I believe the world is patriarchal because men are bigger and stronger than women, and can beat them up."
Myca: "Jesus is not the reason for the season, and there's no way I need to act like he is. Christmas is a stolen tradition. There's no reason we can't steal it back."
Lady Gaga: "I hate the holidays! I'm alone and miserable, you fucking dumb bit of toy!"
Dianna Agron: "I am trying to live my life with a sharpie marker approach. You can’t erase the strokes you’ve made, but each step is much bolder and more deliberate."
John Mayer: "It occurred to me that since the invocation of Twitter, nobody who has participated in it has created any lasting art. And yes! Yours truly is included in that roundup as well. Let me make sure that statement is as absolute and irrevocable as possible by buzzing your tower one more time: no artwork created by someone with a healthy grasp of social media thus far has proven to be anything other than disposable."
Vanessa, Something Positive: "I like 'em crazy. You hear insane rants, I hear a reminder that the sex is interesting. Oooh! Hear that? Tonight's gonna tingle."
Anonymous: “Your problem is that you want to be an artist. What you need to be is an artisan.”
Sugar: "Ask better questions, sweet pea. The fuck is your life. Answer it."
Wide Lawns: "Often very odd things happen to me. Usually they are not my fault and mostly beyond my control."
Anonymous reporter: “When weird shit happens around here, weird shit really happens around here.”
Anne Johnson: "Today some stranger sent me an email that said, "You are a nut case." Well, I must admit this never would have occurred to me. Everyone else is a nut case. I'm the sane one. I think."
Carl Mayer: "Whenever I start to feel like my life isn’t where I want it to be, “Cops” is there to put everything into perspective. Yeah, I haven’t made all the right moves over the last 34 years, but I’m not hiding from the police under a kiddie pool, either."
This may make you feel better: contact hypothesis. "The contact hypothesis makes a simple claim: If you could get more non-Muslims to interact with Muslims, whether as neighbors or business partners or in a host of other contexts, that percentage would likely drop. And while this idea sounds idealistic, there’s solid evidence behind it — significantly more than there is behind other ideas, like corporate diversity trainings, for reducing prejudice that focus more on information and awareness than personal relationships."
On another related note:"People may not know the story about how the University of Alabama football team finally became integrated. It’s legendary coach, Bear Bryant, wanted to integrate the team but was vehemently denied by the racist governor, George Wallace. So, Bryant invited the integrated USC football team down to Alabama in 1970 and Alabama got CRUSHED. After the game, Bryant was seen with a smile on his face because he knew this was the turning point: Alabamans were stubborn as hell to change… until they saw it affect their football team." (It makes sense if you read it all...) "No one goes. No athletes. No championship teams. No performers. No musicians. No celebrities. ALL invitations are rejected. No White House Correspondents Dinners. No Inauguration Balls. No State dinners. No singing Christmas carols with the Trump kids. Nothing. Full boycott. No exceptions. Donald Trump does not get to enjoy the perks of this job. Period. For the rest of us: we don’t support anyone or any company that enabled Trump. Like those NBA teams, we boycott all Trump businesses. We turn off CNN. We don’t buy Ivanka’s bracelets. This amazing GrabYourWallet campaign will tell you how (@shannoncoulter). We don’t spend money to support the teams of his owners — we don’t buy their merchandise or tickets to their games. We leave their stadiums empty and we reject the advertisers who support them. And we turn away from anyone who violates this ban, no matter how much we might like their work. Any product, team or company associated with Trump is one that tacitly funds bigotry and intolerance."
"Over the last day or so, however, we're seeing something a bit new: Trump caving or getting rolled on numerous fronts all at once. Just in the last 24 hours he appears to have been rolled so many times that one imagines his rough edges might start to be worn down until he becomes something more like a clumpy and perhaps oblong ball."
"Reached late last night, Conway, referring to the song used in the popular “Saturday Night Live” skit about her last year, said, sarcastically, “I’m walking on sunshine.”(New Yorker)
"almost every single move that Trump has made against the scientific enterprise has quickly been retracted. His administration may be prone to grand, aggressive gestures of control, but it always seems to follow them with a grand volte-face." ... "It’s possible that Trump has been governing by trial balloon. That’s how he carried out his presidential campaign: He’d float some outlandish notion—e.g., that South Korea and Japan ought to have nuclear weapons or that women should be punished for illegal abortions—and then abandon it if necessary. Perhaps his staff has adopted this approach. They’ll propose something extreme (a case-by-case review of all scientific publications, for instance) and then back down if it doesn’t fly."
Safety Pin Box. "Sure, the sample project we have on our site right now is about power-mapping. It involves guiding folks through exercises to learn what power-mapping is — how to define power, learning to evaluate power structures in their lives personally, then taking it a little wider and evaluating power in their community. We ask them to go to some sort of community meeting, whether it’s a city council or a school board meeting, and take notes: Who holds power in the meeting? Who talks first? Who talks longest? Why is that?"
Chorus: a fictional (for now) story: “People in places like Cambridge and San Francisco, they cheered over Trumpie resigning. But they didn’t realize Pence was gonna be worse.” I nodded. “You old enough to vote?” I asked. I wasn’t. I’d only just turned 16. “Next time I will be,” she said. “But will it matter?”
"Being president is harder than Donald Trump thought, according to aides and allies who say that he’s growing increasingly frustrated with the challenges of running the massive federal bureaucracy. In interviews, nearly two dozen people who’ve spent time with Trump in the three weeks since his inauguration said that his mood has careened between surprise and anger as he’s faced the predictable realities of governing, from congressional delays over his cabinet nominations and legal fights holding up his aggressive initiatives to staff in-fighting and leaks."
How it should be glamorous to change your mind:"We cannot properly convince anyone so long as we depict our opponents as straw figures. We will be unnecessarily weak advocates of our own ideas when we forget what it was like not to hold them. But once we grow into people who change their minds, and remember without shame why we were once on the other side of an argument, we’ll acquire the greatest gift for trying to communicate our ideas to the world: we’ll know what it was like to disagree with ourselves."
Why pessimism is the key to good government. "In an ideally pessimistic society, rather boring and extremely steady politicians are the norm. No one believes the wilder utopian promises of firebrand leaders. The electorate is simply far too pessimistic to trust in easy, rapid solutions to any of the nation’s substantial problems. Dramatic promises at the stump are immediately discounted with a wry, dismissive shrug. Because pessimists know just how flawed any one individual can be, the ideal pessimistic society invests heavily in strong, slow-moving, independent institutions that prevent too much power from ever falling into the hands of a single person. Furthermore, these institutions are insulated from the fluctuations of public opinion – which, pessimistically, are seen as being hugely prone to hysteria and overreaction."
In Congress, Republicans are quiet and meek as mice: "There would have been howls of outrage, of course, and multiple investigations, and even calls for impeachment. But it’s President Trump doing all those things, so Republicans in Congress are as meek and quiet as mice. Perhaps the most striking thing about the chaotic and exhausting first three weeks of the Trump administration is the degree to which Republicans have held together, placing loyalty above all else. The party of Lincoln has sold its soul — and like all Faustian bargains, this one will not end well."
In a time of tragedy, could Trump soothe the nation? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. "The second caveat is that we don’t know the ending of Trump’s story. His style of communication is attractive now because it helped him overcome nearly impossible political odds. But in, say, the fourth and final year of a failed presidency, Trump’s tone and approach — his insults, his self-centeredness, his strange inability to discern appropriateness — may appear in a different light. A virus produces antibodies. Americans may become exhausted with his shtick. The decency of the country may be deeper than the Trump phenomenon."
What I'll do next."My biggest plan is a Valentine’s Day thank-you drive: I’m organizing valentines to members of Congress from both parties who have shown strength of character and sound judgment in standing up to President Trump’s agenda. Even a small gesture gets a valentine, as I want to encourage as many positive acts by our representatives as possible. I’ve already sent about 20 valentine cards out and will continue until the 14th — I’m hosting a valentine party this weekend." I also like this guy from my town: "If our state, which yielded almost two votes for Hillary Clinton for every one for Donald Trump, is unable to resist the backward actions of the new federal government to my satisfaction, I will work toward independence for the California Republic." And this one: " I’m still searching for how to follow up but will not quit the resistance."
Here’s how you can deal with Trump — besides drinking Everclear: "Join. A church or synagogue, a union, your local Planned Parenthood chapter, the Chamber of Commerce, the Sierra Club, Elks Lodge, Veterans of Foreign Wars or American Legion post: The issue and the ideology don’t much matter; what matters is connection."
A blueprint for resistance to Trump has emerged. Here’s what it looks like. "1) Have (guarded) faith in our system. The battle over Trump’s immigration ban is not over — the question of whether it will remain on hold goes to the Supreme Court, and the underlying legal dispute still must be resolved. But Thursday’s unanimous decision by the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 9th Circuit — which kept the hold in place for now — is significant. Crucially, the decision affirmed the role of the courts in “reviewing the constitutionality of actions taken by the executive to promote national security … even in times of conflict.” Whatever the legal significance of that declaration in this case, as a statement of principle this may loom large later, given what we might expect Trump to try to do on national security grounds, particularly in a “time of conflict.” 2) Keep pressuring Republicans to exercise real oversight on Trump. The fact that House Oversight Committee Chairman Jason Chaffetz (R-Utah) agreed to rebuke Kellyanne Conway for her on-air commercial for Ivanka’s clothing line is an indication that congressional Republicans cannot ignore any and all of the Trump White House’s ethical transgressions forever. 3) Fight hard in the Senate with all available procedural weapons. Congressional scholar Sarah Binder has a good piece Friday that details all the procedural tools that Senate Democrats can use to “focus attention on controversial parts of the president’s agenda and force Republicans to cast potentially unpopular votes.” They can also “offer unrelated amendments to bills under debate, affording Democrats the chance to create discord among Republicans and between Republican senators and the White House.” 4) Keep looking to civil society and try to fortify it where possible. The Atlantic’s Jonathan Rauch has a nice piece arguing that if Trump does continue shredding basic democratic and governing norms, civil society — a loosely knit coalition of legal and political groups, given ammunition by intense scrutiny from watchdogs and media outlets, and backed up by meaningful, sustained public mobilization — can have a real illuminating and constraining impact. As Brian Beutler notes, the early indications are actually somewhat positive: “Our democratic and civil society institutions, however flawed and weakened, are still working.” 5) Keep Trump distracted and off balance, to minimize the damage he can do. It is often argued that Trump throws out chum about trivial matters to distract the press from covering more damaging stories. But I’m going to suggest an alternate possibility: Trump’s cause is also harmed by trivial, petty and burlesque distractions."
A Definitive Timeline of Donald and Melania Trump's Relationship: "She ran into Donald just at the right time. She was just about out of money, at the end of her rope and about to move back to Eastern Europe," Also: "A student asks if her husband weren't rich, would she still be with him. She replies, "If I weren't beautiful, do you think he'd be with me?"
Illustrators Against Trump."Here in L.A., illustrators from studios including Disney, Sony, Nickelodeon and DreamWorks have gotten together to collaborate on the picture book Not My President. A crowdfunding campaign is in progress, and proceeds will support the ACLU, Planned Parenthood and L.A. Justice Fund. The creators are describing the project as a "children's book for adults," because although the colorful drawings look as if they were created for kids — the color orange figures prominently, go figure — their subject matter is darker than a Grimm's fairy tale and real to boot."
The 25th Amendment, explained: "Let that sink in — one vice president and any eight Cabinet officers can, theoretically, decide to knock the president out of power at any time. ...The 25th Amendment exists as a failsafe that can be used if any president truly does appear to be unwell — as long as the people involved have the courage to actually go through with it, and the competence to carry it out without causing an even greater disaster."
"Now zoom in on the handful of projects that are the most meaningful and relevant to your values and identity. These are your core projects and they are especially likely to affect your happiness and well-being. This is an empowering finding, as Little explains in Me, Myself and Us, because whereas your traits describe who you are, your projects describe what you do, and they are eminently changeable. Choose the right projects, and approach them in the right way, and you can make your life richer and more enjoyable.
You are especially likely to be happier if your personal projects feel attainable. In fact, Little has found that our confidence in achieving our projects is an even more important factor for our wellbeing than how much meaning a project has. Put differently, there are few things worse than having a core personal project that feels unobtainable. In fact, findings show that when someone is engaged in a personal project that makes them stressed and miserable, this is an even more powerful drag on their wellbeing than other more obvious factors like poverty."
Hatch’s voicemail box was full, so Utah voter tried a pizza box It sorta worked? "About two hours after Silge placed the order, a federal security officer reached out to her. "I got a call about a suspicious pizza," he said over the phone. Hatch's office, it turns out, had refused the delivery and reported it to police — and Silge's name and number were on the receipt.
"I definitely had a sinking feeling in my stomach," she reflected. "At this point, I'm starting to realize this was maybe not my best thought-out plan."
But though the pizza was trashed, the senator's office saw Silge's post on Twitter — a screenshot of the online order which has been retweeted more than 5,000 times — and informed Hatch about the message.
"We appreciate all creative efforts to reach Senator Hatch, particularly as we deal with a large volume of out-of-state callers that are preventing Utah constituents from reaching us," the senator's staff said in a prepared statement. "Unfortunately, the pizza did not make it through security screening because the office had not ordered it."