Days Three and Four

1 hour each (total 7.5 hours).

Monday I woke up way too early and did my hour then. Good thing, 'cause I was not up to it that night.
Tuesday I did it during lunch at work, something that I may or may not be able to do on a consistent basis (certainly this week I only have 2 free lunches). I think this is technically still On Schedule, though I will be falling off the wagon tomorrow because I have to run errands during lunch and it's a no-go day (writer's group). Will have to make myself attempt to work during volunteering night, which is always kind of iffy at best (at least it is during NaNo) even on slow nights, which are likely this late in the quarter. I think the 17th will be a no-go day rather than a question mark day because apparently now I have stuff going from 11 a.m. on that day.

The thing about NaNo is that it's relatively easy for me. Assuming I'm not having a total shit writing day or totally busy, I can generally knock out the daily minimum or go over and the rest of my life is relatively free to watch the tube, knit, socialize, la la la and still make word count. But 50 HOURS? Can't get around that time thing by working speedily. I went over to a friend's house for dinner Sunday night and felt guilty that instead of working, I was sitting around watching people play with fabric. I felt guilty last night for watching Sarah Connor for two hours and then feeling too tired to do much of anything else but shower and go to bed after that. And I was really looking forward to watching my Netflix, but I didn't even TOUCH them all weekend. Argh!

Am still going through notes and thinking of how to totally rewrite this. I suspect very little of draft #2 will even be saved, or if there's any point at all to going over it considering HOW MUCH of this thing needs rewriting, pumping up, etc. Definitely is going to need a new outline. I am seriously pondering not even going through draft #2 whatsoever or just in a cursory manner.

Then again, you know what? I AM AFRAID OF EDITING. I have no problem doing it for other people, I just hate doing anything for me beyond "change spelling or rewrite a sentence"-type stuff.

Here's what I do whenever I turn in something to writer's group:
(a) People give notes. I write down what they say. They have good points, though if they mention stuff I have no idea how to fix, I freak out.
(b) They also write notes on the papers and hand them to me.
(c) I stick them in a folder, chuck the folder somewhere in my house, and...ignore it. For months.

My resolution for February was to work on editing a particular story. I could not even FIND the notes for this thing. I told this to my shrink on oh, February 29, and she said, "I bet you find those now." She was right, I found them the dad-blamed next DAY...just as NaNoEdMo started.

I have those notes for that story on my desk. I have barely managed to make myself read oh, one of the notes. I am inwardly wincing at the "I don't know how to fix that's."

*whineeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*

This is bad.